Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Lucky me
A young man asked me today, "Dr. J., where do you get your zest of life?" Now, mind you, I was merely setting up for class, shuffling papers, writing on the board, talking to myself (yes, I do that all the time). I glanced up and smiled, wondering, "He sees zest?" Well, he had been in my class for several weeks now, so perhaps I had exhibited some zest along the way. I could see he was sincere and waiting for an answer. After a moment of thought, I popped back, "I don't know. I'm just a happy soul." He chortled, "Well, I know that, but where does it come from, what makes you that way?" How does one pinpoint that? I know some of you who are reading this are happy souls too. Have you thought about it? Do you know why? Do we have to know why? Maybe people want to know so they can make themselves happy souls too. Ahhhh, that could be it, but I'm not sure you can learn it. I do believe you can work on it, even make it happen. Me? I'm healthy, have a roof over head, food in the pantry, great friends and family, much fun in my life, a job I love and so much more...why wouldn't I be a happy soul? Have I had tragedy in my life? Yes, but I'm alive and kicking and making the most of each day I get to enjoy. Am I overly optimistic? I don't think so. I just choose to see the best, to believe the best, to trust the best will win out in the end. Come on, my fellow happy souls. Shout out and add to my lovely insanity. Zesty much? Let's share our secrets.
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I am not one of the innately happy souls, and I don't have the answer. I think it takes a lot of courage to stand in your essence, so my tentative answer is: courage. I will be checking back. This could be very useful in my counseling practice!
ReplyDeleteI find the secret in thankfulness. Also, I like to live in the present and temper my expectations with a little reality. I get alot of help with that last one from my wife and close friends who keep me grounded. I like to see the divine in what is placed in front of me; knowing that all things cross my path for a reason. Contentment for me comes with continual thankfulness. And that is a process that begins with vocalizing my blessed plight. Like you said, Lucky me!
ReplyDeleteHappiness seems to be the mystical thing we all search for in life. Sometimes, even when it's right in front of us. I have found my joy to come from delighting in the small things in life, surrounding myself with loving and positive people, and never settling. I think the day that you stop searching for your bliss is the day that you've lost it forever. Perhaps, ironically, I’ve found that with the amount of negativity in this world some of us fortunate enough to have that “zest” in life have started to wonder “Why me?”. Some of this possibly in relation to the innate nature humans have to tend to covet their neighbor. Misery, in fact, does love company. It is conceivable that this is why we are drawn to those who possess the same mindset that we have or adapt to it as the case may be. Which is why I prefer to surround myself with as many affirmative and genuine people as possible. However, I believe if you keep seeking the peace within we all may find our own personal sanctity.
ReplyDeleteKeep sharing your “zest”! It’s infectious!
One more thing ...
ReplyDeleteI wanted to explain a bit more regarding what I meant when I said we tend to covet our neighbor. Years ago when I arrived at my absolute happiness in life I found that those I most expected to rejoice with me were actually envious. This caused me to share less and less of my life with the vast majority of friends and even family. It's funny how life can throw us those unexpected curve balls. I do agree that a large part of the zest you talk about is an inherent trait. It is my hope that throughout our lives we continue to uncover that part of us ... some of us just have less digging to do than others!
I knew it. I knew you were out there and was so hoping you'd speak out with me. I've always firmly believed that positives (and the willingness to be positive) way outweigh negatives in this world. We just hear more about the negatives. You all make wonderful points and you make them so naturally eloquently. Whether you consider yourself a "happy soul" or a searcher or just someone trying to muddle through a sea of obstacles, dive in and let's keep the conversation going. Zest...it's not just a fresh-smelling soap. Discuss...
ReplyDeleteI know that I could not be CONTENT on my own. My joy and contentment in life comes from the Great Comforter. Of course I must do my part and not just be a bump on log and hope that God "makes me happy." It takes effort to remember and rely on the promises that God has made to us. It’s not easy when I rely on my own futile attempts to be happy, but once I determine (daily) to rely on the Lord, then it is VERY easy. Jesus said he came to give LIFE and to give it more abundantly. Something to think about…
ReplyDeleteLife is what you make it! I've had some to say, "why did you go to"_______"? "That's such a drag....nothing happens there." Well, I've found that it IS true, Life Is What You Make it!! OR "Why did you live there? There's nothing to do there?" Well, there is, if you MAKE it! It's all about you, your friends and what you make things to be! Plain and simple. It's out there, GO GET IT!! It's waiting on YOU!!!
ReplyDeleteDr. J,
ReplyDeleteI try to find out what peoples food for life is, what makes them have the motivation and willpower to go on? I wonder about the power within when I see people who suffer from illness such as MS and cancer. I don’t think most people who are unhappy choose to be, they just don’t know how to “give up” to happiness. For some people the known is better than the unknown. It’s like a GPS system with a virus; it has a programed destination but can’t seem to find the right destination. I think that everyone would like happiness in one way or another. Oprah Winfrey’s show is a prime example of people searching for “zest.” However, I think the kind of happiness varies from person to person and from personality type A to personality type B. As the old saying goes “it takes all kinds to make the world go around.” It would be interesting to compare the personality types within a carrier field.
Some people souls have to grow and others have to die, in order to find their place. I thank God for people like you who inspire others to go on.
http://www.oprah.com/media.html
ReplyDeleteMany days I am thinking "why me?" when I should be focusing on "why not me?". We are deserving of all the good things in life. You have to believe in yourself and look for the zest in life for it to find you. Seems when I focus on this I am a happier soul.
ReplyDelete